For centuries, Dads have preyed on helpless unsuspecting children and partners for their own amusement. Today I pay homage to those that have gone before and survived to tell the tale.
HERE ARE MY TOP 10 EYE-ROLLERS:
Victim: I'll call you later.
Dad: Don't call me later, call me Dad.
Victim: Hey, dad, I'm running to the store, need anything? Dad: No, I'm good but I really think you should walk, it's pretty far. |
Dad: I hate oyings.
Victim: What is an oying?
Dad: This joke.
Dad: Did you here about the kidnapping? Victim: Oh no, I didn't. What happened?? Dad: It’s ok he woke up. |
Dad: Did you hear about that scarecrow that won an award?
Victim: Dad, please, no.
Dad: He was outstanding in his field.
Victim: Dad its cold in here. Dad: Go stand in the corner. Victim: Why? Dad: It’s 90 degrees. |
Waitress: (Sees that dad hasn't eaten all his food) Do you want a box for that?
Dad: No, but I'll wrestle ya for it!
Dad: Did you know that all the people who live around here aren't allowed to be buried in that cemetery. |
Guy Behind Counter: (At the Christmas tree store) Are you going to put it up yourself?
Dad: Don't be disgusting, I'm going to put it in the living room.
Waitress: careful, that plate is hot! Dad: It's ok, so am I. |
Are you a Dad joke survivor? Please share your story with me at ljarvis@nestedbean.com!
Your partner in parenting,
Luke